If I read a book and it makes my whole body so cold no fire can ever warm me, I know that is poetry. Emily Dickinson
Friday, April 22, 2011
My current read: "The Secret Soldier" by Alex Berenson
A book I received from Library Thing to review. I have read about 50% and find it both interesting in a historical context and as a thriller genre. Will give a complete review upon completion.
4-30-2011, Still reading over half-way complete!
Wednesday, April 6, 2011
Sometimes...
Sometimes, I dream or think of my second wife, who passed away on her 21st birthday from a massive brain aneurysm, leaving our 10 month old daughter without a mother. I do this frequently and often. It happened in 1973 and still hurts beyond belief.
Today for example is our daughters 39th birthday. I have not seen or heard from her in 32 years. I believe she is well, but that is all I know. You see, I let her mother's parents adopt her at age 7, because it seemed for the best, at the time! Sometimes I regret doing this, sometimes I wonder what my life would have been like if I had not. Sometimes.
Sometimes I remember vividly the day of my wife's death and all that happened...some years I don't think of it at all, or perhaps just block it out. Sometimes, like the other night, I remember my wife's laughter and her nickname for me... "Bear". I think of what we did and where we where, our hopes and our dreams...how excited she was to have a daughter and the joy she shared. Sometimes.
Sometimes I am almost paralysed with grief and just cry...even after all this time. I remember people, meaning well, said time would cure all things...but they lied. Sometimes, I miss her so much it hurts. Sometimes.
Today for example is our daughters 39th birthday. I have not seen or heard from her in 32 years. I believe she is well, but that is all I know. You see, I let her mother's parents adopt her at age 7, because it seemed for the best, at the time! Sometimes I regret doing this, sometimes I wonder what my life would have been like if I had not. Sometimes.
Sometimes I remember vividly the day of my wife's death and all that happened...some years I don't think of it at all, or perhaps just block it out. Sometimes, like the other night, I remember my wife's laughter and her nickname for me... "Bear". I think of what we did and where we where, our hopes and our dreams...how excited she was to have a daughter and the joy she shared. Sometimes.
Sometimes I am almost paralysed with grief and just cry...even after all this time. I remember people, meaning well, said time would cure all things...but they lied. Sometimes, I miss her so much it hurts. Sometimes.
Thursday, March 3, 2011
No reading...Need New Glasses!
OK, my glasses are only 4 - 5 years old...but I need a new prescription for my line-less bifocals. It makes book reading almost impossible, if not merely annoying! Here is where an eBook would be nice, since the type size could be easily enlarged! I've looked at several and the "Nook Color" is my favourite, but at $250 still kind of pricey. The WEB surfing and virtual keyboard aspect is excellent. Perhaps now that the iPad2 is out, they will lower the price?
Thursday, February 10, 2011
Are Some People Too Old To Read?
OK, I admit it, I am oldish, 63 this year. About 7 yrs ago I got line less bifocals for the first time and now need a new prescription. But...the Yellow Pages, Want Ads, etc. use a 6 point type...many books use an 8 pt (does this save on paper?), I can't read that even with bifocals. I'd think with the huge numbers of baby boomers, print would get larger, no smaller. Who decides this stuff? The same gang that decides that the term "Senior" starts at 60, 62, or 65 depending on what the "discount" is for. Silly...it should all be the same...62!
Friday, February 4, 2011
Writing Articles Myth-Article Marketing No Longer Works
by: Jeff Schuman
I have been doing article writing now for about 7 years. In that time I have seen several changes in the article marketing niche. However, one thing that has not changed is the effectiveness of writing and submitting articles.
Although the Internet millions more articles than in 2004 it is still a great way to build an Internet business. This will never change as long as search engines are relying on fresh content to deliver to their searchers.
There are a few things you can do to make your articles more appealing to the search engines and your reader. If you implement a few of the suggestions I list here you will help bust of the myth of whether article writing works or not.
1. Write catchy titles. Your titles must be interesting if you want to get the attention of the reader and the search engines.
You certainly want to include keyword phrases that relate to the theme of your website. This will also be the basis for what your article is about.
A catchy title gives you an advantage over one that is not well written. Scanning article directories and looking for titles that catch your eye is one good idea.
Copy those down and put them in a swipe file. Spend a little bit of time every week re-writing these titles to make them unique.
You will find this is an excellent source of titles for future articles. It will also help you come up with article ideas if you hit a dry spell.
2. Be a problem solver. People still search the Internet looking for answers to problems they have. This gives you an excellent opportunity to write an article that a person would find helpful.
When you submit these kind of articles to article directories they often show up on search engine pages. These articles also become an excellent form of viral marketing as a reader is more apt to refer them to a friend.
3. Write in a conversational tone. I personally like articles that are written as though the author and I are having a conversation. A human element in an article is much more personal and a more enjoyable article to read.
These type of articles give you an excellent opportunity to share your expertise on the topic you are writing about. This is another trick to doing article marketing the correct way.
Over time you begin to brand yourself as an expert on the theme of the niche your articles are in.
Article writing will continue to be a powerful form of marketing for any Internet marketer. It certainly works if you implement these simple suggestions and write and submit a lot of articles online where people can find them online.
About The Author
If you enjoyed this article by Jeff Schuman please visit his article marketing website today. If you are not an article writer he offers a hands off program for getting backlinks and traffic. http://www.HandsOffArticleMarketing.com
I have been doing article writing now for about 7 years. In that time I have seen several changes in the article marketing niche. However, one thing that has not changed is the effectiveness of writing and submitting articles.
Although the Internet millions more articles than in 2004 it is still a great way to build an Internet business. This will never change as long as search engines are relying on fresh content to deliver to their searchers.
There are a few things you can do to make your articles more appealing to the search engines and your reader. If you implement a few of the suggestions I list here you will help bust of the myth of whether article writing works or not.
1. Write catchy titles. Your titles must be interesting if you want to get the attention of the reader and the search engines.
You certainly want to include keyword phrases that relate to the theme of your website. This will also be the basis for what your article is about.
A catchy title gives you an advantage over one that is not well written. Scanning article directories and looking for titles that catch your eye is one good idea.
Copy those down and put them in a swipe file. Spend a little bit of time every week re-writing these titles to make them unique.
You will find this is an excellent source of titles for future articles. It will also help you come up with article ideas if you hit a dry spell.
2. Be a problem solver. People still search the Internet looking for answers to problems they have. This gives you an excellent opportunity to write an article that a person would find helpful.
When you submit these kind of articles to article directories they often show up on search engine pages. These articles also become an excellent form of viral marketing as a reader is more apt to refer them to a friend.
3. Write in a conversational tone. I personally like articles that are written as though the author and I are having a conversation. A human element in an article is much more personal and a more enjoyable article to read.
These type of articles give you an excellent opportunity to share your expertise on the topic you are writing about. This is another trick to doing article marketing the correct way.
Over time you begin to brand yourself as an expert on the theme of the niche your articles are in.
Article writing will continue to be a powerful form of marketing for any Internet marketer. It certainly works if you implement these simple suggestions and write and submit a lot of articles online where people can find them online.
About The Author
If you enjoyed this article by Jeff Schuman please visit his article marketing website today. If you are not an article writer he offers a hands off program for getting backlinks and traffic. http://www.HandsOffArticleMarketing.com
Wednesday, December 29, 2010
Ran into an author friend of mine today, Jason Breedlove..."MYcellf Prisoner of the Pen"; and his new book "1065131 A Memoir" He is a very interesting young man , who is turning his life into success! His book is available at Powell's World of Books in Portland, OR I haven't got to review his new book yet, but plan to do so soon! http://mycellfprisonerofthepen.blogspot.com/
Have you Tried This?
Chicken Mojakka: One of my famous recipes on the Internet! Yummy! http://www.mojakka.com/recipes/mojakka21.htm
Tuesday, December 21, 2010
A Library Thing Review, "The Lucifer Code"
"The Lucifer Code" by Charles Brokaw. Another adventure of Dr. Thomas Lourdes (The Atlantis Code) set in Greece and Turkey. I enjoyed "The Atlantis Code", so getting this novel to read was a bonus. Part biblical history, mostly thriller... in today's world Satan surely is walking the earth in some guise. In a genre I call "Biblical Sci-Fi", and one of my favorites...this novel was an excellent read! It does fit into the Dan Brown type novels, so I imagine his fans will enjoy this novel also.
A Library thing Review, "Peacemaker"
"Peacemaker" by Dan Ranco...A Thriller. Being kind of a computer geek myself, I enjoyed the technology behind this novel. Crazed, power hungry,Corporate Computer CEO's unleash a virus, for revenge and Global Domination. Ha-ha-ha, how can it get any better than that? A fun and entertaining read.
A Library Thing Review, "The Network"
"The Network" by Jason Elliot. A pre-9/11 spy/adventure novel set in Afghanistan. While normally avoiding "first person" viewpoint novels, I was 150 pages into this book, before I even noticed. The author paints a very personal account, with vivid characters. One gets into the mindset of a reluctant, but capable spy, thrust into the world changing climate of Afghanistan. Behind the scenes politics and back door deals at many levels provide some insights into what Terrorism is really about. This book is a great read!
Thursday, December 9, 2010
Posting delays.....my bad!
WOW, I'll have to work up a new list of my recent reads. I haven't posted in a while had major PC problems at home and in Public venues. But I am back up and running and will post my recent reads today!
Saturday, October 30, 2010
My Current Read: "The Skin Map"
"The Skin Map" by Stephen Lawhead, is an interesting book I picked up at the Library about time travel using Ley Lines. The interesting characters are thrown from modern day London to 1600 England and Prague. I really enjoy it so far! Evidently it is the first book in a five book series.
Thursday, October 21, 2010
My Recent Reads:
“Blood Heaven” by Bill Myers, novel about genetic engineering using the 2000 yr old blood of Christ?
“The Promised War” by Thomas Greanias, a novel of traveling back into time to the battle of Jericho to save Israel.
"Threshold" by Ben Mezrich, a novel of genetic engineering.
"Threshold" by Eric Flint, a sci-fi novel about Mars and beyond, alien race artifacts.
"The Extinction Event", by David Black, a murder mystery in a small town in upstate NY, with a climax about an asteroid about to hit the earth in the near future!
“The Promised War” by Thomas Greanias, a novel of traveling back into time to the battle of Jericho to save Israel.
"Threshold" by Ben Mezrich, a novel of genetic engineering.
"Threshold" by Eric Flint, a sci-fi novel about Mars and beyond, alien race artifacts.
"The Extinction Event", by David Black, a murder mystery in a small town in upstate NY, with a climax about an asteroid about to hit the earth in the near future!
Monday, October 4, 2010
My Latest Read: "Marks of Cain"
The "Marks of Cain", by Tom Knox, contains several of my favorite plot lines...conspiracies of the Catholic Church, Nazis, Science gone wrong, history and a few others.
It centers on the Basques and their DNA, Nazi concentration camps, and the real reason for the Holocaust. I found it interesting, and so may you.
It centers on the Basques and their DNA, Nazi concentration camps, and the real reason for the Holocaust. I found it interesting, and so may you.
Wednesday, September 22, 2010
Artists and The "Basics" of Success
"On artist websites, our number one section is usually photos," So said Warner Bros. Records SVP of New Media, Jeremy Welt, at the Bandwidth Conference in San Francisco. Amazing the difference a few good photos can make.
During this time of elaborate marketing strategies, it's easy to forget the basics. Yes, it's true, as an artist you have to market your work, but don't become obsessed with launching a full-blown 24/7 online/offline integrated, strategic marketing campaign at the expense of the basics. It's hard not to get sucked into the marketing trap; everyday another social media, video streaming, email marketing guru emerges with the flavor-of-the-day, must-have marketing success secrets.
This is an era of seemingly endless marketing choices; online marketing including Facebook, Youtube, Twitter, blogging, email marketing and Adwords; traditional offline efforts include advertising, direct mail campaigns and traditional public relations. The trouble is more and more promotional avenues arise; many artists get so wrapped up in their need to market (which is a real need) that they often do so at the expense of their film, CD, novel or art. It can be a trap.
Don't put yourself in that situation. Before you get lost in the myriad forms of marketing, make sure you've covered the basics. An elaborate marketing campaign is not going to serve you if you haven't developed a cohesive message, a strong pitch and interesting photos and images.
So pull back a bit and pick one or two marketing avenues to focus on and make sure you've covered what's truly necessary. Which brings us back to images; the Internet loves photos. They cause people to stop and look. The more photos on a site, blog or social media site, the longer visitors stay. According to Welt, whereas once artists basically used five to ten basic looks and photos, now it's closer to 300 to 400 per campaign. Not that you need that many to start, but ten would be good. Start with a good website, a compelling press release and ten interesting images. Then move slowly and methodically. Launch a local media relations campaign. Create and daily work a Facebook page. You can slowly add to that marketing approach. Be consistent. Stay with it. Stay focused and it will work.
Copyright © Anthony Mora 2010
Retrieved from "http://www.articlesbase.com/art-articles/artists-and-the-basics-of-success-3319209.html"
(ArticlesBase SC #3319209)
During this time of elaborate marketing strategies, it's easy to forget the basics. Yes, it's true, as an artist you have to market your work, but don't become obsessed with launching a full-blown 24/7 online/offline integrated, strategic marketing campaign at the expense of the basics. It's hard not to get sucked into the marketing trap; everyday another social media, video streaming, email marketing guru emerges with the flavor-of-the-day, must-have marketing success secrets.
This is an era of seemingly endless marketing choices; online marketing including Facebook, Youtube, Twitter, blogging, email marketing and Adwords; traditional offline efforts include advertising, direct mail campaigns and traditional public relations. The trouble is more and more promotional avenues arise; many artists get so wrapped up in their need to market (which is a real need) that they often do so at the expense of their film, CD, novel or art. It can be a trap.
Don't put yourself in that situation. Before you get lost in the myriad forms of marketing, make sure you've covered the basics. An elaborate marketing campaign is not going to serve you if you haven't developed a cohesive message, a strong pitch and interesting photos and images.
So pull back a bit and pick one or two marketing avenues to focus on and make sure you've covered what's truly necessary. Which brings us back to images; the Internet loves photos. They cause people to stop and look. The more photos on a site, blog or social media site, the longer visitors stay. According to Welt, whereas once artists basically used five to ten basic looks and photos, now it's closer to 300 to 400 per campaign. Not that you need that many to start, but ten would be good. Start with a good website, a compelling press release and ten interesting images. Then move slowly and methodically. Launch a local media relations campaign. Create and daily work a Facebook page. You can slowly add to that marketing approach. Be consistent. Stay with it. Stay focused and it will work.
Copyright © Anthony Mora 2010
Retrieved from "http://www.articlesbase.com/art-articles/artists-and-the-basics-of-success-3319209.html"
(ArticlesBase SC #3319209)
Friday, August 27, 2010
My Recent Reads
I have finished these three books in the last week. "The Apostle" by Brad Thor; "Mid Scrambler", by Chris Grabenstein; "Scavenger" by David Morrell. All are in the genre of Thrillers. I liked them, so should you, if your into that type of reading.
Tuesday, August 10, 2010
New Reviews
I just reviewed two books on "Library Thing". "The Cobra", by Frederick Forsyth and "Broken", by Karin Slaughter.
Wednesday, August 4, 2010
Online Writing - How Can You Earn More Money?
by: Sutikno Slamet
This is probably one of the most frequently asked questions when it comes to online writing. Most of the newbies to this career see those jobs offering a dollar for five hundred words, and while they might work for that amount to start with (just to get some experience) they soon want to build up and earn more for their hard work.
And why not? Every writer should earn what they are worth, and the better you get the more money you should be able to bring in.
So how do you earn more from online writing? The trick is to raise the bar. If you have been writing for a dollar for 500 words, you need to start dismissing those jobs from now on. Think about this for a moment - if you spend time considering whether or not to apply for those low paid gigs, you won't be able to spend as much time looking for higher paid jobs.
You need to get into the habit of only considering higher paid jobs in the online writing world. And you'll find - as I did - that as soon as you raise that bar in your own mind, you'll start finding other jobs that you can apply for.
There is another tactic to remember here too, and it works in conjunction with the first trick I mentioned above. This is all about numbers. You need to apply for as many higher paid writing jobs as you can. The more you apply for the better the chance is of actually winning more of them.
It can be depressing to think about the percentage rate of winning jobs to losing them. Some writers have mentioned winning around ten per cent of everything they apply for. Now if you think that it is depressing losing a full 90% of the jobs you go for, you need to think of it in a different way.
For every ten jobs you go for, you'll win around one. So if you want to get two writing jobs you'll have to go for twenty in total. Get the idea? Think in terms of what you need to do to win the number of online writing jobs you actually want to get.
As you can see, your own frame of mind can have a big effect on how much writing work you get. And the more you get the more money you will earn. And of course, you now know that if you raise that bar a bit higher you will be bringing in more money before you know it.
About The Author
Still Looking For A Job? Get Paid For Writing Short Articles and Stories. No Experience Required to Join. Start Earning Up To $375 Per Day Writing For Large Companies. Visit : http://www.realwritingjob.net For More Information!
This is probably one of the most frequently asked questions when it comes to online writing. Most of the newbies to this career see those jobs offering a dollar for five hundred words, and while they might work for that amount to start with (just to get some experience) they soon want to build up and earn more for their hard work.
And why not? Every writer should earn what they are worth, and the better you get the more money you should be able to bring in.
So how do you earn more from online writing? The trick is to raise the bar. If you have been writing for a dollar for 500 words, you need to start dismissing those jobs from now on. Think about this for a moment - if you spend time considering whether or not to apply for those low paid gigs, you won't be able to spend as much time looking for higher paid jobs.
You need to get into the habit of only considering higher paid jobs in the online writing world. And you'll find - as I did - that as soon as you raise that bar in your own mind, you'll start finding other jobs that you can apply for.
There is another tactic to remember here too, and it works in conjunction with the first trick I mentioned above. This is all about numbers. You need to apply for as many higher paid writing jobs as you can. The more you apply for the better the chance is of actually winning more of them.
It can be depressing to think about the percentage rate of winning jobs to losing them. Some writers have mentioned winning around ten per cent of everything they apply for. Now if you think that it is depressing losing a full 90% of the jobs you go for, you need to think of it in a different way.
For every ten jobs you go for, you'll win around one. So if you want to get two writing jobs you'll have to go for twenty in total. Get the idea? Think in terms of what you need to do to win the number of online writing jobs you actually want to get.
As you can see, your own frame of mind can have a big effect on how much writing work you get. And the more you get the more money you will earn. And of course, you now know that if you raise that bar a bit higher you will be bringing in more money before you know it.
About The Author
Still Looking For A Job? Get Paid For Writing Short Articles and Stories. No Experience Required to Join. Start Earning Up To $375 Per Day Writing For Large Companies. Visit : http://www.realwritingjob.net For More Information!
Friday, July 23, 2010
Solitude
alone without being lonely, quiet, yet welcoming a brief sound in the silence
nature’s music surrounds the solitude
an internal and external phenomenon
emotions ebb and flow like a mystical tide
desire for companionship sometimes dispels
the need for solitude, a quest to unite lonely beings into a whole
that is beyond singularity
the sounds, the feelings, the wonder of just thinking thought without direction momentary aberrations of time and space
amazement at imaginary journeys of the soul
nature’s music surrounds the solitude
an internal and external phenomenon
emotions ebb and flow like a mystical tide
desire for companionship sometimes dispels
the need for solitude, a quest to unite lonely beings into a whole
that is beyond singularity
the sounds, the feelings, the wonder of just thinking thought without direction momentary aberrations of time and space
amazement at imaginary journeys of the soul
Tuesday, July 20, 2010
Immortal Love
the tension of love begins
familiar yet new
intense beyond a faded memory
a scintillating light in the darkness
love that lasts an eternity
a distant place in the heart and soul that beckons
two to become one
Immortal love
sadness is dispelled
regrets fade into the past
feelings burst forth like blossoms in the early spring
the distant journey begins
a void is filled with passion
tears are created from pure joy
completeness exemplified by calm
Immortal love
Friday, July 16, 2010
Online-Writing-Jobs - Paying Freelance Markets Opportunity
by: Sutikno Slamet
If you are a screen writer, there is a one stop job bank you can visit for instant access and almost immediate listing. Imagine have the opportunity to choose among more than 1000 jobs in the freelance writing world. How would you feel? You will definitely feel on to of the world knowing that many online freelance hunters doesn't have this kind of opportunity at your finger tips.
When I discovered this paying market I'm about revealing to you, I wondered why it had taken me so long to find this rich data base which freelance writers can mime for information in the several listed categories which is specific about your writing talent.
Here is the talent category or interest listed by online-writing-jobs for freelance jobs:
· writing jobs
· copywriting jobs
· magazine
· blogging
· website writing jobs
· content writing jobs
· article writing jobs
· book writing jobs
· ghost writing jobs
· proofreading jobs
· travel writing jobs
· public relations jobs
· journalism jobs
· research jobs
· review
· resume writing jobs
· entertainment writing jobs and lot more
You think about a ready gateway to the hidden treasure on freelance writing markets. Advertisers fall over themselves to get a piece of your talent. They are desperate to hire you. That means your frustration of not having job to do will soon be over with this information at your disposal.
If you are then so serious about your hunting job for writers all you just have to do is to rush to the location of the site as detailed among other 101 freelance paying markets.
About The Author
Still Looking For A Job? Get Paid For Writing Short Articles and Stories. No Experience Required to Join. Start Earning Up To $375 Per Day Writing For Large Companies. Visit : http://www.realwritingjob.net For More Information!
If you are a screen writer, there is a one stop job bank you can visit for instant access and almost immediate listing. Imagine have the opportunity to choose among more than 1000 jobs in the freelance writing world. How would you feel? You will definitely feel on to of the world knowing that many online freelance hunters doesn't have this kind of opportunity at your finger tips.
When I discovered this paying market I'm about revealing to you, I wondered why it had taken me so long to find this rich data base which freelance writers can mime for information in the several listed categories which is specific about your writing talent.
Here is the talent category or interest listed by online-writing-jobs for freelance jobs:
· writing jobs
· copywriting jobs
· magazine
· blogging
· website writing jobs
· content writing jobs
· article writing jobs
· book writing jobs
· ghost writing jobs
· proofreading jobs
· travel writing jobs
· public relations jobs
· journalism jobs
· research jobs
· review
· resume writing jobs
· entertainment writing jobs and lot more
You think about a ready gateway to the hidden treasure on freelance writing markets. Advertisers fall over themselves to get a piece of your talent. They are desperate to hire you. That means your frustration of not having job to do will soon be over with this information at your disposal.
If you are then so serious about your hunting job for writers all you just have to do is to rush to the location of the site as detailed among other 101 freelance paying markets.
About The Author
Still Looking For A Job? Get Paid For Writing Short Articles and Stories. No Experience Required to Join. Start Earning Up To $375 Per Day Writing For Large Companies. Visit : http://www.realwritingjob.net For More Information!
Saturday, June 19, 2010
Best Best Seller Lists
Bestsellers
| Top Sources Thanks to http://www.bookspot.com/bestsellers.htm |
Thursday, May 20, 2010
My current read, "Eye of the Red Tsar" by Sam Eastland
Just finished this book I received for review from "Library Thing". The lead character Pekkala is Finnish, where my paternal grandparents are from, and starts during the reign of the last Tsar, the war of Communism in Russia, which are both things my father and grandparents went through.
It was an intriguing look at the early days of the Soviet Union and Stalin and the last days of the Romanov's.
The characters were engaging, the scenic descriptions realistic and interesting.
It gave me some further insights into my family genealogy, like The Finnish Guards, and the Russian & Finnish War.
I look forward to the new novel in 2011, featuring Pekkala, "The Emerald Eye".
I recommend this book to anyone interested in a good suspense novel or a historical based novel.
It was an intriguing look at the early days of the Soviet Union and Stalin and the last days of the Romanov's.
The characters were engaging, the scenic descriptions realistic and interesting.
It gave me some further insights into my family genealogy, like The Finnish Guards, and the Russian & Finnish War.
I look forward to the new novel in 2011, featuring Pekkala, "The Emerald Eye".
I recommend this book to anyone interested in a good suspense novel or a historical based novel.
Monday, May 10, 2010
Funny Questions About Life
by Hal Lacious
Ever had one of those funny questions about life? Then please read on. When it comes to funny questions and thoughts about life, every time I think I've seen them all I find one I've never seen before or come up with more of my own. The following are some of the ones I've discovered or written however, I know there's more because thats, well... life. So, if you find while reading these funny questions and thoughts about life make you smile, pass them along. All right, let's get started!
Funny Questions about life - Group 1 Why does Hawaiian pizza also contain Canadian Bacon? Grape Nuts cereal. No grapes - no nuts. Huh? What's the difference between regular ketchup and fancy ketchup? Do Dutch people always split the bill? If you use Miracle Whip on Wonder Bread, do you have to use Heavenly Ham?
Funny Questions about life - Group 2 Is there ever a day that mattresses aren't on sale? They make bullet proof vests, why not bullet proof pants? Why are oriental rug stores always going out of business? Is there any difference between partly cloudy and partly sunny?
Funny Questions about life - Group 3 If it only takes one match to start a forrest fire, why on earth does it take me a whole box of matches and a can of lighter fluid to light my grill? When they ship those styrofoam peanuts, what do they pack them in? How do you know when pickles or sour cream has gone bad?
Funny Questions about life - Group 4 How does one know when their bagpipes need tuning? Allstate Insurance has a disclaimer that reads: not available in all states. What? If Donkey Kong's main character is a monkey, why isn't it called Monkey Kong? Why does the word lisp have an "s" in it?
Funny Questions about life - Group 5 How come you never read the headline, "Psychic Wins Lottery"? The next time someone says, "Now I've seen everything", ask them if they've ever seen a UPS truck parked in a parking space. Has anyone ever really seen a Jolly Rancher? If you get a club soda stain, how do you remove it?
Funny Questions about life - Group 6 Has anyone (besides Donald Trump's wife) ever been fooled by a comb over? Is it really possible to change the direction of a bowling ball by waving your hands? There's senior citizens, so why aren't there junior citizens?
Funny Questions about life - Group 7 They say laughter is the best medicine - so who came up with the phrase, "I died laughing"? Why do doctors leave the room when your getting dressed? After all, they've already seen you naked. What's wrong with the United States? They only have two choices for President, but fifty for Miss America. Any reason they nail down the lid of a coffin? When butterflies get upset or nervous, what do they get in their stomachs?
Funny Questions about life - Group 8 Where do they put price stickers on non-stick pans? If it's called lipstick, why is it always coming off? When they sing, "Take me out to the ball game" they're already there. Why? Who's idea was it to make the word abbreviation so long?
Yes, these are just a few of the Funny Questions about life that try men's -and women's souls. And there's a ton more funny questions about life not listed here. Some of them come to me during the course of a day. For example, why does every shampoo bottle say, lather, rinse, repeat? I'm sorry, did I miss my head entirely the first time or do you just want to sell more shampoo? If you have or have thought up any funny questions of life yourself, feel free to send them along and thanks for wasting a few minutes of your life pondering these funny questions of life. Now get out there and do something good. Like figuring out what people in China call their good plates...
Ever had one of those funny questions about life? Then please read on. When it comes to funny questions and thoughts about life, every time I think I've seen them all I find one I've never seen before or come up with more of my own. The following are some of the ones I've discovered or written however, I know there's more because thats, well... life. So, if you find while reading these funny questions and thoughts about life make you smile, pass them along. All right, let's get started!
Funny Questions about life - Group 1 Why does Hawaiian pizza also contain Canadian Bacon? Grape Nuts cereal. No grapes - no nuts. Huh? What's the difference between regular ketchup and fancy ketchup? Do Dutch people always split the bill? If you use Miracle Whip on Wonder Bread, do you have to use Heavenly Ham?
Funny Questions about life - Group 2 Is there ever a day that mattresses aren't on sale? They make bullet proof vests, why not bullet proof pants? Why are oriental rug stores always going out of business? Is there any difference between partly cloudy and partly sunny?
Funny Questions about life - Group 3 If it only takes one match to start a forrest fire, why on earth does it take me a whole box of matches and a can of lighter fluid to light my grill? When they ship those styrofoam peanuts, what do they pack them in? How do you know when pickles or sour cream has gone bad?
Funny Questions about life - Group 4 How does one know when their bagpipes need tuning? Allstate Insurance has a disclaimer that reads: not available in all states. What? If Donkey Kong's main character is a monkey, why isn't it called Monkey Kong? Why does the word lisp have an "s" in it?
Funny Questions about life - Group 5 How come you never read the headline, "Psychic Wins Lottery"? The next time someone says, "Now I've seen everything", ask them if they've ever seen a UPS truck parked in a parking space. Has anyone ever really seen a Jolly Rancher? If you get a club soda stain, how do you remove it?
Funny Questions about life - Group 6 Has anyone (besides Donald Trump's wife) ever been fooled by a comb over? Is it really possible to change the direction of a bowling ball by waving your hands? There's senior citizens, so why aren't there junior citizens?
Funny Questions about life - Group 7 They say laughter is the best medicine - so who came up with the phrase, "I died laughing"? Why do doctors leave the room when your getting dressed? After all, they've already seen you naked. What's wrong with the United States? They only have two choices for President, but fifty for Miss America. Any reason they nail down the lid of a coffin? When butterflies get upset or nervous, what do they get in their stomachs?
Funny Questions about life - Group 8 Where do they put price stickers on non-stick pans? If it's called lipstick, why is it always coming off? When they sing, "Take me out to the ball game" they're already there. Why? Who's idea was it to make the word abbreviation so long?
Yes, these are just a few of the Funny Questions about life that try men's -and women's souls. And there's a ton more funny questions about life not listed here. Some of them come to me during the course of a day. For example, why does every shampoo bottle say, lather, rinse, repeat? I'm sorry, did I miss my head entirely the first time or do you just want to sell more shampoo? If you have or have thought up any funny questions of life yourself, feel free to send them along and thanks for wasting a few minutes of your life pondering these funny questions of life. Now get out there and do something good. Like figuring out what people in China call their good plates...
Friday, April 23, 2010
A Local author, "MYcellF Prisoner of the Pen"
Jason Breedlove is a fairly huge, young man who frequents the Senior Center, playing Pinochle, and chatting whit us old timers. Jason spent time in prison. He wrote down his thoughts, many of which are profound, while some are profane. Here are a few, which I call anger management issues; after all he was in prison! I thought these somewhat amusing.
“Anger Management”, quotes from Jason Breedlove’s book, “My Cellf, Prisoner of the Pen”
• I’d like to punch you until I damage your whole frontal lobe!
• I’ll knock your f**king gums down your throat!
• Your body will collapse around my fist.
• Remind me later to punch you in the eye.
• I want to hit you with something sharp.
• I’ll send you home with broken teeth.
• You need to douche your mouth!
• I’ll break your f**cking mustache!
• I’ll beat you down to nothing.
It is available from Powells Books, and on-ling at Jason's Blog.
“Anger Management”, quotes from Jason Breedlove’s book, “My Cellf, Prisoner of the Pen”
• I’d like to punch you until I damage your whole frontal lobe!
• I’ll knock your f**king gums down your throat!
• Your body will collapse around my fist.
• Remind me later to punch you in the eye.
• I want to hit you with something sharp.
• I’ll send you home with broken teeth.
• You need to douche your mouth!
• I’ll break your f**cking mustache!
• I’ll beat you down to nothing.
It is available from Powells Books, and on-ling at Jason's Blog.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)


